Are you who you want people to think you are? Or, are you yourself? Dale Carnegie writes in Chapter 16 of, “How To Stop Worrying And Start Living,” that trying to conform to other people’s ideals of who we should or should not be tends to burn us in the end.
Dale points out that it can haunt us in everything from job interviews to relationships. In fact, this idea of pleasing everyone else by attempting to fit their perceptions of who we should be has driven some to the point of taking their own life. They did this because they didn’t feel they measured up to other people’s ideals and expectations of them physically and/or personality wise.
Why is it that we should be something we are not? What’s the point? Do you like people who are fake or otherwise less than genuine? I know I don’t! Neither does the Human Resource person; who can easily tell when an individual is telling them what they think they want to hear rather than the truth.
People who want to be someone else rather than who they are don’t particularly fare well in social settings because, whether consciously or unconsciously, those around them eventually tend to pick up on what the “Wannabe” (for lack of a better term) is doing. It’s a turn off to other people when we pretend to be what we are not.
Besides; most of us live well within our limitations. What does Dale Carnegie mean by saying this in his book? Well, apparently, someone in the scientific community has figured out that we only use about ten percent of our brain. That means that there’s a lot of untapped potential locked in our heads. This means that we barely scratch the surface when it comes to even thinking about using the other ninety percent of our minds.
Dale tells us that it also means that we have other gifts and abilities within ourselves that are lying dormant, waiting to be tapped. Between what we do use and what we have yet to discover about ourselves; we are unique.
Dale explains to us in this chapter that, even just genetically speaking, if we had three hundred thousand billion brothers and sisters from the same set of parents (man oh man would I pity the mom who gave birth that many times), none of them would be exactly like us. So, when you stop to factor our genetic makeup into the equation, plus all the other stuff talked about in this chapter regarding why we are all unique individuals, we are sort of forced to face the fact that we are each a one of a kind.
Besides; who wants to be a cheap knockoff? Why should any of us ever have to be? We all know that the real deal is of a much higher quality and, in some instances, just down right priceless!
So, go for it! Be the best real you that you can be and leave the imitations in the dust!